How to Know if Your Teen Is Ready for Social Skills Training
If you're weighing up a social skills program for your teen, you've probably asked yourself: are they actually ready for this? It's one of the most thoughtful questions a parent can ask — and an important one, because the honest truth is that a program like this isn't right for every teen, or isn't right just yet.
I'm Chris, a certified PEERS® provider and the founder of Social Skills Australia. I'm also a parent of teens on the spectrum. So let me walk you through what readiness actually looks like — in plain terms, without the sales pitch.
1. Motivation — the one that matters most
Of everything on this list, this is the deciding factor. Programs like PEERS® are designed for teens who have some genuine interest in making and keeping friends, and who take part voluntarily. The whole approach relies on a degree of social motivation.
But here's the important nuance: your teen does not have to be excited. They just need a flicker of wanting it. A teen who, deep down, wishes they had friends — even if they would never say so out loud, even if they roll their eyes at the idea — has exactly the motivation the program runs on.
The honest flip side: a teen who truly has no interest in friendship, is genuinely content on their own, and is completely dead-set against the whole idea, probably isn't ready right now. And that's okay. Sometimes the right answer is “not yet,” and there's no harm in waiting until the spark is there.
2. The right age and stage
Social skills programs are usually grouped by life stage, because the social world of a 14-year-old is very different from that of a 22-year-old. At Social Skills Australia, high-school-age teens join our adolescent groups, while those 18 and over join the young adult program, which also covers areas like dating and workplace relationships. Matching your teen to the right group matters more than the exact number on their birthday.
And readiness isn't about diagnosis. PEERS® suits teens with autism, ADHD, anxiety, and a range of other social challenges — what unites successful participants is motivation, not a particular label.
3. “But my teen will resist!” — normal, and not a dealbreaker
This is the worry that holds the most parents back, so let me put it to rest. Almost no teenager is thrilled at the words “social skills class.” A bit of reluctance is completely normal — expected, even. It is not a sign your teen isn't ready.
What matters is the quiet wish to connect underneath the eye-rolling. And there's a lot you can do to lower the resistance: frame it as a group of other teens like them rather than “therapy,” point out that it's done online from the comfort of home, and present it as learning a skill — not being “fixed.” Most teens warm up quickly once they realise it isn't what they feared.
4. Are you ready? The part most parents miss
Here's the piece that often gets overlooked: a good social skills program isn't something you drop your teen into and collect them afterwards. PEERS® is parent-assisted by design — you take on the role of social coach. That means a real commitment from you too: weekly involvement, helping set up get-togethers, and a little gentle coaching at home between sessions.
It's a genuine ask on your time — but it's also a huge part of why the program works. The coaching is what helps the skills carry over from the screen into your teen's real life.
So — is your teen ready?
If there's even a small spark of wanting friends, your teen is very likely in the right place — grumbling and all. If you're genuinely not sure, that's exactly what a no-pressure chat is for: we can talk it through honestly and work out whether the timing is right.
Download our free guide, 5 Steps to Making and Keeping Friends (socialskillsaustralia.com.au/free-ebook).
Book a free chat with me (socialskillsaustralia.com.au/register) to talk through whether your teen is ready.
Social Skills Australia delivers UCLA's evidence-based PEERS® program online for teens and young adults with autism and ADHD across Australia.